Name Game

I was reading an article in Cosmopolitan magazine about celebrities getting married and changing both names to both the wife’s maiden and the husbands last name.

It was almost 3 years ago when I got married and had the last name discussion was before that. I did take his last name leaving my maiden name for the males in my family to keep. C does have my maiden name, for now. I asked B about me keeping my maiden name, just for fun, and he was almost offended. He is from further south than I am and it is his mentality for me to take his last name.

Honestly, I just like asking questions to get opinions, I was going to take his last name anyways. I thought for half a second about hyphenating my name, but I wasn’t that attached to it. And I am pretty sure my dad knew there would be a day that I took another last name.

The thought of B taking my last name and us having 2 last names, it’s just silly. Call us old fashioned. I never had actually signed his last name until I got my new license a few days later. Now, I am very attached to it.

What did you do? Hyphen? Put your maiden name to your middle name? Take his like I did? Make up a whole new one? Or are you both sporting both last names?


Anniversary Present-3 years

With our anniversary nearing, it was time for me to think about what to get B. I was looking at a blog and I came across a link in the comment section for Red Envelope
Never heard of them so I checked them out. Sometimes I am stumped on what to get him since he is such a simple man.
I was in luck. In their “For Him” section, I found these guys:
A simple Google search and I had a 20% off coupon added to my order if I used a visa card, which I did. And it was on its way. Shipping was a little costly, they use FedEx, but with my discount, it was only $25.something. Not bad in my book for a gift he will love.
They came today and they are perfect. We are the type of people who can’t surprise each other often, he already knew they were coming since after I ordered them, I freaked out and thought he wouldn’t like them. He got them today and loves them. He wants to make them into wall hangings but he will have to wait until at least our actual anniversary (July 9th) before I will alter them for him.
Any gifts you have given that weren’t a surprise? Given cotton for a different anniversary than 2nd?

The Engagement

Previously, I wrote about how B and I met. I was talking with some friends and I haven’t shared this part of our story.

A little backstory first: when B and I started dating, I didn’t have a car. He technically didn’t either. B bought a car, a 1993 Cadillac DeVille with a gold grill. Fancy, right? That car became Betsy. She thought she was a truck and he bought her in November 2009. We weren’t together very long but he had me put the car in my name. So we shared the car until February 2010 from different residences. Weird right?

We were living together after that and sometimes he would borrow a car from a co-worker, the night in April, I had Betsy and he had a borrowed truck. He called me to invite me to dinner at a pizza joint he liked.

I showed up and we were across the parking lot from each other. He calls me and says he thinks he burned a hole in the seat and could I come look at it? I thought this was weird because he doesn’t smoke. I went anyways.

He steps back from the truck, mind you, we are in the middle of a parking lot. On the seat is a box. He coaxes me to hold it, but I don’t open it. The next moments seem to have lasted a lifetime.

I am standing at the driver’s side door holding a ring? box. While he is dancing by the truck bed on the same side. He says “I’ve just got one question.” more dancing. I say, “uh huh.” still holding the closed box. He repeats himself and so do I, this goes on for another time except I say, “yea?”

He responds, still dancing,” will you marry me?” I actually say nothing. Instead, I open the box to find a diamond solitaire ring and slip it on my finger. I hug him, I kiss him and while still embraced, he says, “so, is that a yes?” Doh! I hadn’t said anything! Of course it was a yes!

I still laugh at that day and that moment. He never saw me slip the ring on my finger. We were in a dim parking lot at night. I still laugh that I married a wonderful man, who proposed marriage in a parking lot! If you ask him, he says it’s because that is who we are, we are one of a kind. We had late night meals, met up with each other. It has been crazy and fun and we wouldn’t have it any other way.


Divorce… Not Our Cup of Tea!

I think this is something that happens quite a bit in the “industry” (restaurant industry that is).

Recently, B found out that a former sous chef of his is getting a divorce. It saddens both of us to hear this. We never like hearing that people we know are getting a divorce. It sucks.

My parents divorced when I was 2. My mom remarried fairly quickly and was divorced from him by the time I was 8. My dad waited a long time before marrying again and I was a bridesmaid in his wedding. He got a divorce a few years ago. My mom got married again a few years ago, for the 3rd time.

I know what it’s like for a kid and it’s not easy. I never wanted my daughter to feel that way. So, when B and I got engaged, I knew before he even asked that divorce was never a part of our future. We don’t think it’s the right thing for us. I would say we don’t believe in it, but it’s kind of hard to say that.

We entered our marriage at 25 (me) and 35 (B). We waited to find the right person and we were never shy about who we were. I knew I was marrying a chef. I knew that it wasn’t going to be puppies and rainbows. I knew that there would be times when I was going to be doing things on my own. I am perfectly fine with that. I just know that he loves me and I love him and that’s all that matters at the end of the day.



Holidays for us here are different. It usually depends on what kind of job B has during that time.
Easter, mothers day, father’s day, memorial day, labor day, new years eve, and valentine’s day you can almost always count on a chef working. Especially mine. The other major holidays, they vary.

Currently B works at a place that will give him most holidays off. This Sunday may be the exception due to the opening of a new restaurant. He may have to work easter, my other favorite holiday (thanksgiving being my number 1).

B had missed many of the mentioned holidays since we have been together. Sometimes, I could go eat at the restaurant. Alone at the empty cocktail area, of course.

B did take a little of a year off. He worked his tail of to become an estimator at a lumberyard. He made decent money and it was honest work. A much needed break for him. A break that caused me to quit school and work full time as an assistant manager at a gas station. It nearly ruined our marriage. It was nice to have a semi normal family life, except we had to work around my sleep schedule.

Holidays aren’t the only thing B has had to miss out on. He wasn’t there after I found out we lost the first baby. He stayed with me after I lost the second but was drowning himself in his work the next day, unable to sit idle while I slowly crept into a deep depression, something I struggle with to this day, almost two years later.

I know he does what he can and he was there for me when I got my severe concussion and when C and I were in a car accident. He was able to wait in the waiting room while I went to surgery for the second loss.

No matter the day or the occasion, I know that B loves me and C and honestly that’s all that matters. We try to make the most of our time together when we have it. We know that we are loved by the other and we aren’t afraid to show it.

Just remind me of this past come Sunday when my husband is at work and there isn’t a jello egg in sight and I am cussing because my husband is at work. lol